Gutted close friend committed suicide
Losing a friend to death is depressing, with suicide its devastating. Unfortunately that is what happened to your blogger last week, when a childhood friend working and residing in state of Queensland took his own life. It was Tuesday noon when i was running errands when I received his mail: “Contador Harrison – Thanks for being one of my best friend for the last 25 years, want to appreciate for all of your humility and unlimited kindness. I wish you an incredible life filled with all the merriment, tranquility, and fondness that you merit.” It was from my best friend whom I met in Gympie more than quarter century ago and took me to different places in his state of birth from Bundaberg, Bowen, Caloundra, Warwick, Gladstone, Goondiwindi and Maryborough among others. When I opened the email, I convulsed and wheezed: “Contador Harrison I’m taking myself out of this planet today.” After seeing the mail, I contacted him instantly but there was no response. So I contacted his younger brother, who called his father and mother urging them to find him immediately since he was in Albert Street Brisbane at the time. Panic stricken, I emailed and texted him back reminding him how incredible people in the community loved him. Phone rang more than 15 times but never picked. I sent texts informing him help was on the way but despite the frantic efforts by multiple people from family and friends, the help arrived too late. Half an hour later, a message from his younger brother confirmed the shocking news that his best friend on earth was gone.
Australians have seen a rising number of suicide incidents that were widely spread through social media and messaging applications. I still recall the Akubra ad girl who committed suicide after online bullying, for instance. Although the incidents was deeply tragic, at least it opened up public discussion about suicide issues in Australia, issues which have been largely stifled for years in Australian society.Too little is discussed about the suicide incidents’ hidden victims, the family members and friends.Your blogger can tell you that the nature of the grieving process that the suicide loss have to go through is very complicated. Plenty of negative emotions often haunt the people around the person who died by suicide. The deliberate nature of his suicide death lead me to think that I should have been able to prevent the death of my lovely friend, which has caused guilty feelings and a sense of failure. It is quite common for the suicide loss to feel angry towards their loved ones because they felt betrayed by them. The days when community demonized the person who died by suicide are long gone and it feels people realize the importance of saving a life no matter someone could be going through. In majority of cases involving suicides, mental illness is said to be the main cause. My friend had no specific mental condition that can be blamed for his suicide. In his death, there are no answers, just endless questions. I can only imagine how he felt in the final moments of his life which makes makes me fall into pieces to think how alone he felt. It is my view that the willingness to write about my friend suicide shocker would allow more people to be more open about suicide-related issues. There’s need for all of us to de-stigmatize the suicide-related stigma. A careful use of language and avoiding speculation about the reason for the suicide makes a huge difference.