Adultery is here to stay and should be decriminalized

March 30, 2015

The divorce rate are increasing because spouses filing their cases with the courts in most countries where numbers of those separating is rising by the day.If there is something that I dread in life is marriage and consider it a frying pan.Having more than one wife where sexuality is enjoyed by the husband and wives or a man with his concubines, the game is based on nurturing deep affection to foster individual happiness.Marriage is defined as a physical and emotional bond between a man and a woman for the purpose of building a family based on religious or civil laws.Married couples often have sex while fantasizing about making love with a celebrity or an ex-lover.Quite recently, a friend of mine working as Lawyer shared how divorces are making him more richer by the day.However, he did express curiosity as to why the divorce rate in his country have increased despite one-roof judicial system. According to him, most judges conduct divorces for couples too easily. As a Lawyer, and based on his experiences in many divorce cases, such a trend is disaster for a developing country like his.Worse, he said most judges were motivated to gain “prominence” for consultancy in their careers and the more they separate spouses, the more reward points they get.I often find many people trying to deceive the law by presenting a joint agreement to divorce while they did not have any legal reason to support their desire to divorce as stated by the law. In such cases, judges are not immediately convinced to divorce them, but must examine whether they really have strong legal reasons or not.Judges will not divorce spouses if their marriage is in fact harmonious.In most countries divorce laws that I’ve come across stipulates that divorce can only be allowed for various reasons like adulterous partner, a spouse live separately for a stipulated duration of time without any legal reason or the other’s permission.Other common reasons are when a spouses is convicted by a court and sentenced to more than two years’ incarceration or longer during the marriage, a spouses commits cruelty and extreme oppression which threatens the other’s safety, in some African countries when a spouses suffers from a disease and or physical defect which is incurable, preventing him or her from fulfilling his or her spousal duties and the spouses are in an extreme and continuous dispute without hope of living together in harmony can also lead to divorce.

There are four phases of sexuality that drives relationships and marriages namely orgasm, stimulation, plateau and resolution.Married couples or polygamous men always do their best to synchronize the four stages in their sexual life and those who fail to do so end up being sore losers.Those men who lose control of their sexual drive it can lead to intercourse with illicit female partners.Blokes or ladies engaged in sex with illicit partners or committing adultery enjoy the four phases in an egoistic way by merely releasing their sexual urges. The best example is commercial sex workers who have deep experience since its a daily routine that doesn’t necessarily mean enjoying sexuality.Men’s sex drive is different from women’s and in most cases men’s sexual urges can come at any time while women are most aroused during their fertile period.Studies have shown men are sexually active and women passive. Scientists have told us repeatedly that women can curb their sexual drive but they become hard to control when sexually stimulated. Under normal conditions women can control their drive and in their lives polyandry is rarely practiced. Polygamy through marriage is found in all parts of the world and many people in offices practice polygamy with their secretaries and close friends through infidelity and adultery. Those of us who’ve worked in corporate sector knows what am saying is black and white truth.Men engaged in sexual intercourse through adultery experience added value in terms of enjoyment.Boredom in having sex with legitimate partners can prompt infidelity or adultery.Men’s inability to restrain their sexual drive, followed by the fact that adultery gives them added value in sexual enjoyment, has become the starting point for their adulterous life.In human life, single and married, one of the biological needs is to enjoy sexuality. Sexual enjoyment can be a solitary act, an act between a couple of the same sex or both sexes, and an act between more than two people. It can be a conscious or unconscious experience, enjoyed in the unconscious mind, dreams or fantasies. In most countries, the law stipulates some difficult requirements that need to be fulfilled by spouses seeking divorce. The law does not recognize as a basis for divorce the kind of agreement that is accepted.In Australia where my cousin recently divorced, a spouse can mutually agree to end their marriage contract after 12 months of living separate lives and that was what my cousin used to separate with her boyfriend after she found he was cheating.Divorce cases are increasing every year and there are so many factors involved, all of which are very complicated and interrelated behind such decisions. In developing countries,poor economic condition within a family will influence the longevity of marriage lifespan and when it comes to countries in Africa, it commonly happens that a young man is allowed to marry a girl even though he doesn’t have an income.

Young men with no permanent job to make money and those who entirely depends on maintenance from their parents still get married.End result is adultery whose income is used to fund their daily needs. Among the Maasai’s who lives in northern Tanzania and southern Kenya, lack of responsibility by spouses for their marriages is also responsible for rising divorce cases in the community. Most husbands leaves their wives for several years and never comes back. In some extreme cases, they even marry other women in their new location.In Tanzania and Kenya, cheating married women are known to prefer Maasai men as their chosen cheating partners due to their so called ‘extra performance’ and perfection.In cities and urban areas, research has shown that dispute between spouses also causes divorce whose main causes are bad communication, immaturity, a lack of mutual understanding among others.Having intimacy with illicit partners is known as adultery, which is only about sexuality is forbidden in dozen of countries which means polygamy dominated by illicit sexuality is illegal.In animal kingdom, experts have taught us that mating is an instinct that unleashes the sexual drive in both males and females within the same period.The satisfaction in animal sexuality is a shared experience rather than egoism which is common in human beings.Animal sexuality is identical with reproduction, which is polygamous as well as polyandrous in nature. No monogamy is found among animals because they lack proper intelligence and those of us old enough knows Bloodhound Gang song Bad Touch that proved animal sexuality is guided by instinct courtesy of Discovery Channel, and there are natural signals that ensure mating only takes place between adult animals and during fertile periods. Therefore,whether your government has blocked access to the popular adultery websites like Ashley Madison or not, adultery is here to stay and those in marriage or relationships must learn to live with it and stop living a lie.For those spouses wishing to, it is matter of agreeing that separate on a particular date, fill in an application form and pay the filing fee and I believe Lawyers are not required then move on.And without divorce, how will other men-less women get hubbies?Let people divorce and those who can’t zip up or lock their thighs for one solution provider, its your right to go for pancakes even when you’ve flapjacks at your disposal.

Contador Harrison